Which category(s) do you fit in?
▢ Overwhelmed when I think about it
▢ Don’t think about it
▢ Don’t have a plan
GAP
GAP
▢ Have designed a future I would like
▢ Am co-designing a future with my significant other
▢ Am co-designing a future with God
GAP
GAP
▢ ‘Intimate’ with my future
▢ Somewhat distance
▢ In the process of building a relationship with it that feels healthy
GAP
GAP
▢ A mix of the above
▢ None of these
▢ Something else……………
GAP
GAP
Looking to the future in a proactive and intentional way, brings up many different emotions, depending on who you are and what perceptions of the future you carry.
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Some may say your reaction and relationship to the future is down to your personality, but that’s just part of the picture. Our life experience, education, role models, friends, family and our beliefs will have conditioned us in certain ways. All of these will affect how we think about our future and how we pursue it. Our levels of hope and expectation of our future also drastically affect how we treat it.
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‘The future’ is a big category. Most of us will have parts of the future we are positive about, alongside other parts we refuse to think about, alongside parts that we feel negative about.
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Some people switch off straight away when I raise the subject of the future to. They are just not interested. They will change the subject or say they haven’t really given it any thought, or maybe that they haven’t got the time or inclination to go there. I guess they are more ‘present’, in the moment. Or they may still be in the past, reminiscing over happier past times.
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Other people have big goals, many ideas, maybe a life vision, and LOVE talking about the future. Some people appear more connected to their ideal future than their ‘now.’
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Most of us are somewhere in between.
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Are these different reactions simply down to personality differences? Having coached a lot of people, I would say it’s less about personality, and most often simply fear that’s shutting this area down.
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So, what do I mean about having a ‘relationship’ with the future? I do of course mean having a healthy relationship with the way you think about your future. This would mean being able to dream about what’s possible, what you really want, and planning for it.
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Future areas would typically include, looking at progress in work, mission, ‘call’ or something purposeful and impactful to do with your time (this is still applicable in ‘retirement’), financial goals, fun in your future, relationships to develop, skills to grow, ‘learning’ to enjoy, moving or transition to make happen….and whatever else fits on your list for your life.
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So where are you at?
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What areas of your future do you feel safe thinking about, and which do you avoid thinking about?
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Which areas do you feel hopeful and happy about, and which areas do you feel doubtful, sad and negative about?
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Why bother to write a blog like this?
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One of my passions as a coach and mentor is to help people to get free from areas of lack, and from areas where they have blind spots that are holding them back. God created you as a masterpiece (Eph 2:10). He has an amazing plan and purpose for each of us (Jer 29:11). So not tuning into, not fully exploring all that is possible as a child of God is a waste. It’s sad. It’s a tragedy.
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A lot of people have a somewhat laissez-faire approach to their futures. They have a policy of ‘leaving things to take their own course’, without interfering. This may in some ways on the surface of it, look admirable, or even seem like a form of freedom. But often it’s because they haven’t thought about their relationship with their future. Being without a vision, makes us like ships floating around the sea with no destination, tossed and turned by every and any wind, or left in one place because of the lack of wind.
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This approach isn’t hugely beneficial to us to find and walk in all that God has for us. Most examples given in scripture of God guiding people into their call start with people taking action, moving towards something or somewhere. Moving towards a vision they have. On the way, God speaks and guides them and sometimes redirects.
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Finding and carrying a vision, knowing our unique and personal purpose, is the life we are created to live. The whole process of examining our hearts and what God has planted there towards our purpose is exciting and fulfilling. It’s in this place of discovering all of this and stepping forwards into it, pursuing it passionately, that we flourish. We become most alive and stretch into adventures we would not have dreamed of. It’s in this place that we meet God in the most intimate ways, stretching our faith and drawing on heaven’s resources as a child of God.
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But the laissez-faire approach is ‘safer’, less dangerous. It can be an approach that is backed by poor theology, which tells us that we are to sit and wait and expect God to reach down towards us and give us a clear instruction. Anything that happens can tend to be read as God guiding us. He could of course be guiding us. What is lacking in this approach is that we are not taking any responsibility for developing a vision with Him, which becomes an overarching theme in our life which can guide us day to day.
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A people without vision perish. (Prov 29:18)
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What does a healthy relationship with your future look like?
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STEP 1 – Dreaming and designing your future
STEP 2 – Planning and stewarding a vision, dreams and desires accordingly
STEP 3 – Re-Imagining negative areas without hope, into a hopeful and expectant place
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STEP 1 – Dreaming and Designing Your Future
Often dreaming and designing is the hardest step for some. So much of how they have learned to think, opposes this process. Fear not, there are some simple coaching tools that will release you into accessing what God has put in your heart and will activate your creative nature, which is part of God’s DNA that you have as His child.
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STEP 2 – Planning and Stewarding a Vision
For some turning ideas into reality feels like the hardest thing. Fear not, God is practical and supernatural. He can help. Coaching is also designed to get you there on this one!
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STEP 3 – Re-Imagining Negative Areas Without Hope into Hopeful Expectation
This area may be the hardest area for many of us. Life, disappointments, tragedy, and more, bring us to a place of feeling tired and let down. We may become cynical that things just don’t work out or believe we were wrong to believe in the first place.
We therefore need to self-manage and care for ourselves where we need it! Existing in a place of ‘it will never change’, won’t help us or the situation.
Personally, I’ve had some of these areas, which I’ve had to work on hard for a few years, and am still improving. Not working on these areas leads to depression and hopelessness. Sometimes just asking God to shift it, is all that you need. Other times He wants us to spend time reversing our thinking and turning into His truth.
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What areas of your future life do you have hopefulness for?
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What areas do you not?
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One of our simple, coaching tools that students learn how to use in Level 1 of our coach training program is the life wheel. This is such a helpful tool to enable you to look at the main categories of your life and measure your contentedness. This usually brings up areas that need addressing and can be changed. Shifting one area positively affects all areas of your life for good.
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There is always more. The renewal of our minds (Rom 12:2) is a process, a lifelong process but it is an exciting process that takes us closer to God and our purpose and potential.
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If you discover areas you need to flip positively, do contact me, I LOVE coaching people through this kind of stuff! You will be amazed what co-creative coaching sessions will shift and the incredible change it will make to your life!
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A fulfilling life is one packed full of purpose and adventure, with joyful, hopeful expectation of the future. This is a life where we have no choice but to exercise great faith and grow closer to God whilst we pursue things that are more than we could ever have imagined.
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Check out forthcoming Online Destiny Activator Coaching Workshops for help in designing a future which you can be excited about.