A common theme that I have observed over the last two decades of coaching, is that the process of launching into new things tends to take quite a lot longer than we ever expect.
This can be super discouraging, for those of us brave hearts that decide to change up the day job or put ourselves out there for something new and untested.
Well laid out plans tend to not work out the way we expect. Delays and unexpected obstacles come at you from all different angles.
Sometimes, it seems to take forever to even get to a stage of having a plan, which feels clear and achievable and in which you feel confidence.
It often feels like it’s all just taking too long, way, way, way too long!
How do we process this feeling?
How do we posture our heart, when all we may feel is disappointment, frustration, or hopelessness?
What does it look like to work through these frustrations and come to a healthy place?
And how can we get patience, that thing that everyone tells us we need more of!
All we ever hear from others trying to encourage us is, ‘be patient’, ‘in God’s timing’, but how do we come to a place of peace where we can find that patience?
Here are some encouraging ‘reframes’, some different perspectives for you to try out. I hope and pray that these will help you to come to a place of more peace, more trust and a place of hope and excitement, even though it’s all just taking too long!
- Realize you are in good company.
We have dozens of examples of Biblical characters to read and learn from. One important observation is that from time of ‘the call’, the time they heard a call from God in some way, to actual realisation of that call, tends to be a very long time.
Examples. From Paul’s Damascus Road’ encounter with God that changed the trajectory of his whole life from persecuting Christians to becoming one, to Him stepping into the role of ‘Apostle’, and doing the things we read about through his writings, is calculated by scholars to be about 17 years! (In the Bible we just turn the page and it’s all happening. The reality is that Paul was waiting 17 years. No details are given as to what he was doing during that time. I suspect maybe his tent making, that we know was his main business.)
Moses spent 40 plus years in the wilderness, having left the comforts of the palace where he was raised, waiting for the day when God spoke to him via the burning bush. God asked him to go back and lead the Israelites out of Egypt into the promised land. He then ended up leading the Israelites around the wilderness for 40 more years to get to the promised land. That’s a lot of years!
Joseph’s story: From the time he had his prophetic dream of being in a high position and his own brothers bowing down to him, to it actually happening was 25 years.
So, whether it’s 5 years or 20 years or even longer, you are in good company, and I assure you, you will find someone in the Bible who waited as long as you or much longer!
Aligning to a Biblical perspective on timing is a useful reframe to what may feel like its taking too long!
- The journey is meant to be as enjoyable as the destination.
Looking at timing as above is challenging, it doesn’t feel encouraging, but, it invites us to change our thinking. If we waste years feeling frustrated, hopeless, and angry that it has not happened yet, we are wasting what is meant for those years. Those waiting years could be filled with; joy, preparation, learning, growing, maturing, fruitfulness, meaning, connection with God, other dreams and vision being fulfilled along the way.
Think about each of those and step into them by asking yourself and God:
What joy have I experienced along the way?
What joy can I experience here that I am not?
In what ways has God been preparing me, my character, my skills, my anointing, my community, my connection to Him, my maturity of identity as a son/daughter? What mistakes has He turned into valuable training and learning experiences to prepare me for where He is taking me?
What fruitfulness can I see in my life so far? How thankful do I feel about this?
What dreams have already been fulfilled?
- Identify possible stoppers.
We do have to wait for God’s timing.……but sometimes we are the ones stopping our own next level.
Check yourself for this. You may be the most qualified person for the vision you have that is not happening, but there may be some rough edges that God is trying to smooth out.
There could be some resistance in you in some way towards being completely surrendered to Him. There could be some hurts or wounding’s that need healing before you are safe to be in a higher position of influence. As you read this blog the Holy Spirit may be bringing to your mind what these things may be for you. If not, open your heart and ask that He will bring to mind things that need sorting in order for doors to be open.
On the other hand, don’t assume it must be you delaying things. It may be that it is just not God’s timing yet. Don’t fall into self-condemnation. If Holy Spirit doesn’t show you anything you need to change, believe it’s not you. But always remain open to be led by the Holy Spirit to sort out anything if Holy Spirit chooses to reveal what needs sorting, in the right time.
CHRISTIAN COACHING
The fact is that we cannot change God’s timing. God’s timing is God’s timing. Job’s friends assumed it must have been him that bought God’s judgment on him for what happened to him, but it was not. Those friends that suggested Job was being judged by God, were reprimanded by God. It’s Holy Spirit’s job to judge not yours.
As a side note, God often releases us in ways we don’t expect. Sometimes we are already released but just don’t recognise it.
So, now you’ve read this how do you feel about things taking too long?
Imagine, you would not gift a Ferrari to an 8-year-old child. But that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t gift it to them at 30. (If of course they still want it). God has infinitely more wisdom than we do, and His timing is perfect even when it doesn’t feel like it, and we can’t understand it.
God will open doors and release you when you are perfectly ready and in His perfect time. Don’t give up. Lean into understanding His timing and enjoying the journey, by asking Him to give you discernment and His wisdom on His timing.
Bless you.
Tina